The last couple of days I have not been feeling too well and my anxiety has been on high alert. Add to that a lack of sleep and a virus of some kind. Which equals out to me being somewhat depressed as a result. Earlier I had gone out to DQ for a Blizzard and as I did for some reason my eyes went down to my shadow below me. From there my eyes moved to my walk in my shadow below me.
I have no idea why my eyes were drawn to the way I was walking as I never really give any though to my movements or body language in general. As I walked I kept going back to what I saw in the shadows on the sidewalk underneath me. I decided to take the Blizzard with me to go for a walk and get some air for myself.
As I walked I kept peaking at my movements in that shadow. I wanted to see what my walk was like from an outsider looking at me walking down the sidewalk of University Avenue. It is sort of hard to put into words my thought process as I continued to check out my own shadow. My own motion and my own steps on the sidewalk below me.
I am not used too looking at myself from an external point of view. Sometimes I will hear myself speak, but, I never watch how I move around. I was not sure what I was even watching really. They were legs, they were moving and I was moving forward in motion. I had functioning limbs and they were working as intended. I mean what else would I see looking down at my shadow?
I kept having this nagging feeling in the back of my head as I watched myself walk. I was not sure what that feeling was though. All of a sudden I noticed a couple cross the street in front of me. One a woman and the other a man. I for some reason was drawn to look at the couple. Then back down to my shadow.
First I looked at the woman and then at my shadow, my walk. Then I quickly checked out the man she was with and then looked back down at how I moved in my shadow. As I did so I went back and forth quickly between the couple and myself. I kept doing it back and forth looking over everything. Looking over how my legs moved and looking at my hip area specifically.
As I did so I saw I was in fact walking fairly similar to the ladies man whom had her by his arm. I looked back at my shadow and then back at him in the distance. I looked back and forth really quickly trying to take in each motion. I switched to the lady for a moment and then back to my motions/my shadow.
My walk is what it is. I never really watched myself walk before and it made for an interesting night of introspection. I ended up going home and finishing my Blizzard while beginning to work on this article. Now here I am heading off to bed after putting into words how my night went. Hopefully my anxiety does not flare up again and tonight I can get some sleep.
