Optimism, Orientation and Manhood; Self-acceptance and my 30's.

In my last article I wrote about gender and sex. I also wrote a little bit about sexuality in humans and other animals being along a scale. That people tend to be either heterosexual exclusively or bisexual of some sort as are most animals. However, that this was not talked about much even though the truth of the matter is there are 10 times more bisexual people and Mostly heterosexual/straight people over the amount of completely homosexuals. In this article I want to elaborate some more on the subject of sexuality in humans.

I am a 30 year old man and I have lived a long time on this Green Earth of ours. Over the years a lot of experiences have occurred. I have grown a lot as a man and a person in general. I want touch a little bit on the idea of a bisexual community, Something which I will sometimes hear about on YouTube. Especially when watching videos on channels like BisexualRealTalk. This is going to be a very personal post for me and I am going to say right up front that you should be prepared for that. I have long sense divorced myself of the idea of "community" surrounding my orientation. Mostly due to the fact that bisexual males are not highly liked around the GLs and B is lumped in with them.

One of the things that BisexaulRealTalk has brought up before is the idea of divorcing Bs from the GL and T. I actually think this is a good idea and would fully support not even having B tossed in with G/L at all. The truth is that bisexuality is not the same thing as being gay. It is not as some would seem to think something that is related at all. Bisexuals often have serious disagreements with the G and L like denying we exist. Like calling us greedy or calling us confused. Calling us Breeders and being on the fence. You name it and gays/lesbians will call you it. I have had more hatred flung at me by the homosexual community for being bisexual than I ever did from a Straight person. In fact, my existence has only ever been denied by two straight people.

Sometimes it can seem a lot lonelier being bisexual than being homosexual simply due to the fact that the statistical minority of same sex attracted individuals are highlighted the most. 7-8% of the so-called 10% GBLT group is B with GL and T as the least amount of people. Yet, we are shown the least it sometimes seems. This is not a social justice call for more visibility or anything like that. It is just it can seem lonely when you look out into the world and cannot seem to find other people like you. I get why there is talk about having a bisexual community I really do. I know those feelings all too well and life can be hard just in general. It is not a bisexual thing though. It is a human thing and everyone irregardless of preference or orientation can feel alone.

I think there is other reasons for there being less of an actual community surrounding bisexuality in men though. I think it has to do with how the bisexual scale works and where most men fall on that scale. Due to most bisexual males being with women you would never know they were bisexual. Due to this most bisexual males are engaging in mostly heterosexual activity as opposed to say hanging around the Gay Districts or something. This is probably why there is really no bisexual community persay in places. Which helps to make the loneliness grow stronger at times for those wanting a community. Over time I have come to realize in my times of loneliness it is not something special that needs other people just like me. It is not the lack of bisexually aware folks that makes me alone at this time it is simply not meeting the right person.

The truth is I am going through during times when I feel lonely nothing that anyone else could not. I do not think it is a bisexual community that bi people need. I think it is just friends and companionship in general. The same thing everyone else desires from life. Whom these people go to bed with should not matter to you. A bisexual male should like any non-bisexual simply keep optimistic and look for opportunities to get out. To get to know people and maybe, just maybe one day people whom are alone will find a companion. I have gotten used too the fact that I am a single, 30 year old man and that so far I have not met the right person. I have also realized that I lost so-called friends not due to me having any issues, but, because these others were not worth my time. In the end I am better off without them.

The truth is as well that we all need to have self-acceptance that is not pinned to an external factor. We need to have acceptance of whom we are in general and what that means to us. We need to have character and be good people. I refuse to need to use the B word every single time I make a statement related to my love life in order to be considered not ashamed.

In the end of things I think mindset means a lot. We all need to be optimistic and not let ourselves worry too much in life. Us single, eligible men will find someone someday. Even if we do not it is better to be alone and not with someone whom is wrong for you than force yourself to be with someone you cannot stand. I also want to give a nod here to manhood in general. Your being capable and having the ability to have sexual and/or romantic feelings with both genders to even the slightest degree does not affect your manhood. It does not remove your man card and it does not make you less than. Nor does it make you less of a man if you ended up with another man. Nor does it make you homosexual all of a sudden and having been confused. Bisexuality is a permanent state no matter where you fall on the scale, spectrum or grid. No matter what your digits are.

I also want to say to people on the 3 part of the scale that Mostly Straight, heteroflexible and mostly heterosexual is not in anyway a denial of being on the scale with the rest of you. It is not a denial of being bisexual it is simply another term that does identify ones scale amount and digits. Forget the titles and just accept the scale exists and anyone with the ability to be into either gender are on it. Even further; forget your orientation altogether and just get to know other people. Live life and enjoy it we will all die someday and at that point it will be too late. Get out and live a little! Embrace individuality and just embrace being alive. The world can be a pretty amazing place if you look at it with the right glasses and with rational Optimism.

\

Gender is not a spectrum it is a biological reality and it is absolutely a binary. Sexuality is a scale for most non-exclusively-heterosexual animals.

I have not written anything on sexuality for a while nor on gender itself either. However, I ran across some videos on gender, gender identity, sexuality and sex on Youtube. Some of which seemed like I was in fairy land while others were very good. So, it came to mind to clarify some important biological truths about our species of which some will surely balk at. Let us begin with gender AKA sex of the human being.

Yes, gender and sex ARE biologically one and the same thing. If you are born with a penis 9.999999 times out of 10 you will grow up with no issues in your brain about identifying as a male. The same goes for being born with a vagina and identifying as a female. Why? Not due to social conditioning as social Justice nuts and radical feminists would claim. Due to the fact that your brain is either male or female just like your body absent being faced with the mental illness/ medical condition known as Gender Identity Dysphoria (previously known as Gender Identity Disorder prior to the latest addition of the DSM.) Transsexualism or Transgender folks have a form of dysphoria due to one major fuck up in their Mother's Womb or possibly other external factors.

999999999.999% of men have a perfectly ordinary male brain and the same for women with female brains. There is no "fuck up in coding" if you will due to other factors and they have the normal brain that their hormones and chromosomes under normal circumstances of child birth and womb experience produces, The norm for a properly produced offspring in animals of our species is an animal that has by the time puberty is over a full understanding and acceptance of their "gender identity" and sex which are both aligned. This includes in their sexual desires. Which is why most people have an attraction to the opposite sex including people with attraction to the same sex. It is why most non-exclusively heterosexual human animals within our species is in fact on a scale of bisexual and not exclusively homosexual in nature.

The existence of gays and lesbians does not in anyway support the idea of ones sex and gender being different. Far from it as the only difference between a gay and non-gay is how pushed towards one side of the scale of human sexuality you actually are. I am not here arguing as some do that all people are bisexual far from it. In fact, the majority and natural norm of our species is exclusive opposite attraction. If someone is gay and non-conforming that does not make them a third or fourth gender or sex. It makes them a person whom for whatever reason has not developed in the usual way that most people of their gender do. For numerous reasons ranging from pre-birth experience to possibly feeling they need to be non-conforming to conform to their orientation and be accepted by others. Or even not being allowed to develop in the natural way they would have without outside interference.

Someone for whatever reason it is being non-conforming does not make them any less male or female, any less a man or a woman. It does not make Gender a Spectrum in anyway shape or form. On the contrary it shows gender is a binary and that one will exist somewhere on that binary. An androgynous person is someone whom has attributes of the opposite side of the norm of the binary one is normally on not a sign there is no binary. An effeminate person is feminine whether a man or women. A masculine person is masculine whether a man or a woman. There is only the two and being either completely on one side or showing traits of the opposite side of the same binary. This is because there is only two genders which correlate with the two sexes. Most men/human males are masculine most of the time. Most women/human females are feminine most of the time.

What is a scale or spectrum if you will is human sexuality and that is something that most people will not talk about. Most people whom are not-exclusively heterosexual can be found on a scale, a grid or a spectrum. Some people are on the low end like 2 or 2.5 using a Kinsey Scale for example. Some are in middle right down the line and others are on the far end like 5 or 6. If you are a complete homosexual or gay/lesbian you are on the 6. That is someone whom never ever would be interested in the opposite sex ever. If you are a Mostly-Heterosexual bisexual or a Mostly Straight person you are on the opposite end being a 1, 2 or 2.5. With the stereotypical bisexual with no preference whatsoever being dead center with a 3 or middle of the scale without numbers. Someone whom is more into the same than the opposite, but, still has some opposite attraction would be like a 4 and so on.

There is also a mistake that just because there is a plethora of mental if you will Archetypes that a masculine or feminine brain can take up in life it means it is not masculine nor feminine. This is also a big mistake. There is lots of molds that a man can fit and still not be effete or anything. There is also a number of molds a woman can take and still not be masculine or butch. None of these molds means that either person is not masculine or feminine. That there is no binary and that said person does not fit on one side or the other of the binary. Much like the fact that most people even with a bisexual orientation fall somewhere to one side with only certain people being dead center with no preferences at all. The binary is real and it is based on genetics, brain formation and chromosomes. For example; not all men are fixing motors right now, but, they are also not usually wearing Tutus either.

I for example am a masculine man, but, I am not a football jock. I would still be considered if one were to look at me and tick little boxes all man. I tend for example to not be over emotional when I am in a normal mood. I tend to be more stoic the older I get. I have no issues as I get older taking the lead and making decisions. Some of which have been big ones, but, I have had to make them anyways. I have become more assertive and Alpha like if you will the older I have gotten. The fact that I have a pink tie in my collection does not all of a sudden cancel that out about me. This is because there are many manly and masculine archetypes that all kinds of different, but, still completely masculine men fit into. I would argue the last thing a truly Grab Your Balls Man cares about is what people think of him.

This is a sort of diversion, but, the point is the binary is real and all people for the most part fit into it somewhere and somehow. There are only 2 genders and there are only 2 sexes. There is a scale of orientation, but, people tend to cluster more leaning one side or the other mostly. With most people leaning more towards the ending up in relationships with the opposite side. This is just a fact of nature and Mother Nature is a tyranny not a constitutionally limited governing system. People need to stop with all this non-Binary more than 2 genders stuff. Just because you might differ in how you express yourself does not make you someone whom is not the biology that makes up your very DNA. Nor does it mean you actually have Gender Dysphoria unless you have been officially diagnosed as such by a trained medical professional.

Once we get passed the fear and keep going that is real mastery in life! I got this covered!

Confessions of a "book club purist" on principal. Also, a bit more on immigration and borders.

Today I was watching The Rubin Report while nursing myself from not feeling 100% and ran across a term I have never heard before. That term was "book club purist" and it was surprising to hear it from a person whom I have often considered very reasonable. It was used to say that it was unreasonable to support the protection of individualism/individual rights via the non-initiation of force. That there was other things the government needs to do including being Nationalistic, That you need to take care of The Nation as a collective. I find this very odd for someone that has been an ex-candidate for the Libertarian Party of Canada. The person I am speaking of is Lauren Southern.

As someone whom is anti-collectivism in all its forms the idea of a libertarian whom is OK with collectivizing nation over individuals, and country over the person actually makes me roll my eyes. Followed by making me cringe and then have pause. I thought it was quite odd for her to make it seem like people whom were for the NIFP or the individual was anti-reality in some way. She made it seem like the County and Nations role is more than just to protect individuals. More than just centrally making sure that Objective Rule of Law exists and that NIFP/ZAP/NAP is enforced. More than just the defense of individuals and their rights, That somehow the Nation has rights when it does not.

Only individuals have rights and the sole nature of a moral and legally just government is to protect the rights of those individuals. The proper functions of a properly moral and just government is the courts, cops and defense from external threats usually through a military. The only moral way for it to exist is to exist on the basis of serving the individuals in the protection of said individuals. The only just way to do that is to be based on voluntary funding and the non-initiation of infringement of rights AKA NIFP/ZAP/NAP. Taxation breaks an individuals rights and is initiating harm on individuals. In other words I am a "book club purist." I would be identified as such under Lauren's rules and I would proudly wear that label if it is what it is.

This outcome is a logical outcome from the underlying individualism which underpins the entire idea of freedom itself. Freedom means nothing if the individual means nothing. Individualism, individual rights and individual thinking is The Trinity of Liberty; a term coined by The Objective Standard's Craig Biddle. It all comes back the individual and individualism vs collectivism. This is not to dismiss general trends either or that groups do exist. Or that statistics can and do show that certain people tend to be different ways. Nor does this mean dismissing evolutionary psychology as some Objectivist do. Nor does this mean biological determinism is wrong either if it in fact is right. It means that those individuals that make up those groups in themselves as individuals have individual minds. Have individual person-hood and this individual has rights.

This means that if you deny individualism at a fundamental level you are cutting off the legs on which freedom stands. If you place any group as having rights or worth above the individuals in the group on a person to person basis that is not going to be able to give a consistent defense of ones rights. The real culture war is not gays vs straights or men vs women, but, individualism (individual worth) vs collectivism (sacrificing ones worth and mind to an nonexistent hive mind,) This is the real philosophical war and cultural fight. I am an individualist. I am anti-collectivism in all its forms and I will say that unabashedly.

That does not mean I am against co-operation or being social. That does not mean I am against working in groups to get things done. That does mean the individual always comes first. Each of us individually as humans have individual worth and protecting that is what is important. The group has no right only the individuals inside of it. Remove the individuals and the group does not exist. I am a "club book purist." As I am against the idea of Nations superseding peaceful individuals in anyway. Thus I am anti-Nationalism as well. Whether it be economical or otherwise. It is a culture of individualism, individual thinking and individual responsibility based on peaceful living that needs to be saved. Not any culture of any specific ethnicity or Country persay.

Canadian Values are good and should be kept, yes, but, not because they come from Canada. Due to them being values that contain within them a history of things like rule of law and due process. Things like being able to be peaceful with your neighbor. If it was not Canada, but, some other Country that had values such as these and our local values were those of barbarians there would be no reason for some Nationalistic pride nor defense of our Country. We would be ashamed or should be ashamed and welcome people with enlightened values to be here instead. It is not due to the Nation, but, the Canadians. The individuals in the Country that the values are what they are. Individuals with values. Not because Nations are great or a Country because it exists is great.

I do not think my ideas will be put into practice anytime soon, but, that does not mean one should drop their ideas. My idea of a just and moral government is the one I lay out above. Anything else is not moral. However, we live in the real world and this I can agree with Lauren on. We do need to do what we can within the scope of reality as it exists. This does not mean we should be championing Nationalism though as against some Ghost called Globalism. Which is just extending Free Trade worldwide.

I am for both protecting us from dangers from outside the borders that do exist. As well as leaving the borders open to total unilateral free trade with the world into and out of the borders. I am a Globalist in the best sense of the word. I am Pro-Global Capitalism and I am pro a future where Nations protect the individual citizens, but, do not tell them whom they can or cannot sell to or from. Provided all parties are not committing criminal acts and not harming others. Someone in Canada should be able to sell things and buy things from anywhere in the world they can afford to buy/sell with.

Equally someone whom is not connected to criminal activity or terrorist groups should be able to travel anywhere they want for any reason they want full stop. If someone in the US wants to hire someone from another Country to work it is their private property and they get to control whom is allowed on it not the government. However, we do have a real threat in radical Islam. We are at War with a horrid ideology as Trump stated in his RNC speech. I agree with doing something to finally squash the threat and end this War for good. That does not mean that you can extend the treatment of a known threat to the treatment of all immigrants. (AKA Mexicans or any one else) Nor should you treat peaceful immigrants the same as the non-peaceful.

I am for anyone being able to cross the border that is deemed not to be a criminal nor a terrorist threat of some kind. This means the border of any Country in the West. That does not mean I support the way the mass immigrations have been dealt with either. That is immigration from an area that is a hotbed of terrorism without hardly any checking on them at all. You do not do that when you are at war with people in that region it is sacrificial and self-mutilating. I both think we are being pussies when it comes to the threat of Islam, but, also think as an individualist on this issue as well. People whom are attached to being criminal or sympathize with terrorist groups should be dealt with. Peaceful people should be left alone and once checked be given the means to have free movement around wherever they wish to go.

Illegal immigrants whom are not engaging in activities which are harming others or their property should be transitioned to being legal immigrants. Whereas illegals whom are committing crimes should be dealt with accordingly. Illegals with links to terrorist sympathizing views should also be dealt with accordingly. That does not mean you turn The West into Police States either. You do not sacrifice freedom for security without becoming a surf and with the existence of the filthy luger of taxation we are all surfs enough already as it is. What needs to happen is a constitutional and freedom compatible way of dealing with immigration. That is both principled on freedom as well as taking into account the world as it is. However, you cannot do anything that sacrifices freedom for the sake of reality.You can go in the direction of the ideal, but, never away from it. Or else you have given up on the ideas to begin with.