In my last article I wrote about gender and sex. I also wrote a little bit about sexuality in humans and other animals being along a scale. That people tend to be either heterosexual exclusively or bisexual of some sort as are most animals. However, that this was not talked about much even though the truth of the matter is there are 10 times more bisexual people and Mostly heterosexual/straight people over the amount of completely homosexuals. In this article I want to elaborate some more on the subject of sexuality in humans.
I am a 30 year old man and I have lived a long time on this Green Earth of ours. Over the years a lot of experiences have occurred. I have grown a lot as a man and a person in general. I want touch a little bit on the idea of a bisexual community, Something which I will sometimes hear about on YouTube. Especially when watching videos on channels like BisexualRealTalk. This is going to be a very personal post for me and I am going to say right up front that you should be prepared for that. I have long sense divorced myself of the idea of "community" surrounding my orientation. Mostly due to the fact that bisexual males are not highly liked around the GLs and B is lumped in with them.
One of the things that BisexaulRealTalk has brought up before is the idea of divorcing Bs from the GL and T. I actually think this is a good idea and would fully support not even having B tossed in with G/L at all. The truth is that bisexuality is not the same thing as being gay. It is not as some would seem to think something that is related at all. Bisexuals often have serious disagreements with the G and L like denying we exist. Like calling us greedy or calling us confused. Calling us Breeders and being on the fence. You name it and gays/lesbians will call you it. I have had more hatred flung at me by the homosexual community for being bisexual than I ever did from a Straight person. In fact, my existence has only ever been denied by two straight people.
Sometimes it can seem a lot lonelier being bisexual than being homosexual simply due to the fact that the statistical minority of same sex attracted individuals are highlighted the most. 7-8% of the so-called 10% GBLT group is B with GL and T as the least amount of people. Yet, we are shown the least it sometimes seems. This is not a social justice call for more visibility or anything like that. It is just it can seem lonely when you look out into the world and cannot seem to find other people like you. I get why there is talk about having a bisexual community I really do. I know those feelings all too well and life can be hard just in general. It is not a bisexual thing though. It is a human thing and everyone irregardless of preference or orientation can feel alone.
I think there is other reasons for there being less of an actual community surrounding bisexuality in men though. I think it has to do with how the bisexual scale works and where most men fall on that scale. Due to most bisexual males being with women you would never know they were bisexual. Due to this most bisexual males are engaging in mostly heterosexual activity as opposed to say hanging around the Gay Districts or something. This is probably why there is really no bisexual community persay in places. Which helps to make the loneliness grow stronger at times for those wanting a community. Over time I have come to realize in my times of loneliness it is not something special that needs other people just like me. It is not the lack of bisexually aware folks that makes me alone at this time it is simply not meeting the right person.
The truth is I am going through during times when I feel lonely nothing that anyone else could not. I do not think it is a bisexual community that bi people need. I think it is just friends and companionship in general. The same thing everyone else desires from life. Whom these people go to bed with should not matter to you. A bisexual male should like any non-bisexual simply keep optimistic and look for opportunities to get out. To get to know people and maybe, just maybe one day people whom are alone will find a companion. I have gotten used too the fact that I am a single, 30 year old man and that so far I have not met the right person. I have also realized that I lost so-called friends not due to me having any issues, but, because these others were not worth my time. In the end I am better off without them.
The truth is as well that we all need to have self-acceptance that is not pinned to an external factor. We need to have acceptance of whom we are in general and what that means to us. We need to have character and be good people. I refuse to need to use the B word every single time I make a statement related to my love life in order to be considered not ashamed.
In the end of things I think mindset means a lot. We all need to be optimistic and not let ourselves worry too much in life. Us single, eligible men will find someone someday. Even if we do not it is better to be alone and not with someone whom is wrong for you than force yourself to be with someone you cannot stand. I also want to give a nod here to manhood in general. Your being capable and having the ability to have sexual and/or romantic feelings with both genders to even the slightest degree does not affect your manhood. It does not remove your man card and it does not make you less than. Nor does it make you less of a man if you ended up with another man. Nor does it make you homosexual all of a sudden and having been confused. Bisexuality is a permanent state no matter where you fall on the scale, spectrum or grid. No matter what your digits are.
I also want to say to people on the 3 part of the scale that Mostly Straight, heteroflexible and mostly heterosexual is not in anyway a denial of being on the scale with the rest of you. It is not a denial of being bisexual it is simply another term that does identify ones scale amount and digits. Forget the titles and just accept the scale exists and anyone with the ability to be into either gender are on it. Even further; forget your orientation altogether and just get to know other people. Live life and enjoy it we will all die someday and at that point it will be too late. Get out and live a little! Embrace individuality and just embrace being alive. The world can be a pretty amazing place if you look at it with the right glasses and with rational Optimism.
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